Question 1.
We live in a multicultural world and non verbal practices vary from one culture to another. As the worlds gets smaller, one must be sensitive and learn different practices in order to get along with another. The question asks us to identify 4 difference non-verbal practices in any two cultures that we know. Here is what I have found out:
- Food
The practice of consuming food is an important part of any culture. The way food is consumed reflects our culture and what do we stand for. Some cultures eat together and some use utensils instead of their hands. I have chosen the Malay and Indian culture to demonstrate a difference in food consumption.
Malay culture
The Malays have a practice of sharing food by having the food served on a large plate and consumed by a maximum of four people sitting around the large plate. This practice originates from the middle east where food shared the same way. As Malays are Muslims in Malaysia this practice has been adapted by them as they have learned it from the Arabs who brought Islam to them. Why this practice? It is believed that when you sit and eat together the unity of the Muslims will be strengthened. Usually ‘briyani’ or ‘nasi ambang’ is on the menu.
Indian culture
The Indians have their food in their own unique way. They use banana leaf instead of a plate for consumption of food. This practice originates from southern India as many Indians here can trace their ancestry from there. Vegetarian or non-vegetarian food is usually consumed. We can see this practice often during weddings of south Indians. A new banana leaf is placed in front of a guest. Rice along with the gravy and other vegetable dishes are placed on the banana leaf one by one. After the guest has eaten, the banana leaf is taken and thrown away. It is advised to to fold your banana leaf towards you after you have consumed your food to show appreciation for the host.
- Greetings
In order for us to get to know someone new we must first greet them. Some cultures just smile at each other, some rub their noses with each other. I have chosen the West and the East to compare in this practice.
Western Culture
In the western culture, when you meet a person whether you know or someone who is introduce to you, you often will give him or her a handshake. This is custom practice widely around the western world whether is business or in social setting. If you are the host, when your guests arrive always be the first to extend your hand and welcome them to your function. The guest will feel welcomed and comfortable. This is practiced by both men and women. There is no restriction.
Eastern Culture
However in the eastern culture here, we do not shake hands much compared to the west. Take for example the Japanese, they will always bow when meeting their friend or someone new. In a company setting the juniors will bow lower to the seniors as this a mark of respect for their seniority. Another example would be, the Malays. They are Muslims. It is forbidden for men and women who are not of kin to touch. So for example, to greet a person, a man would grasp the other man’s right hand and take one or both of his own hands and touch his own chest as mark of receiving one’s greeting warmly.
- Eye contact.
The study of eye contact is called eculesics. Eye contact is so important they even have a discipline for the study of it. I have chosen Japanese and Western to differentiate the use of eye contact.
Japanese culture
The Japanese do not give much eye contact during conversation. In their culture they find this uncomfortable. This is most important when having a conversation with Japanese women. When having a conversation with them, they do not give much eye contact. As mentioned it is considered uncomfortable and can be taking as staring at someone without paying much attention to what their saying. To handle this situation is to look at the eyes and then look away maybe at other parts of the face before looking back at the eyes. For example the mouth and then the nose.
Western culture
In the western culture however, eye contact is very important during conversation. Good eye contact is essential to show that you are listening attentively to the one who is speaking to you. It is a sign of confidence on your part to them and vice versa. If you do not look at them or have very little eye contact, it can be considered that you have something to hide. You will be cast as being suspicious and have hidden bad intentions. Western women consider eye contact essential during dinner dates with them as it assures that the gentlemen is interested in them.
- Gifts.
Giving and receiving gifts are a part of our Malaysian culture. Gifts are exchanged or given during functions such as weddings or birthdays. There are different ways the three major cultures in Malaysia receive and exchange gifts. I would like to compare the Malay and Chinese culture in this example.
Malay Culture
When bringing a gift for a Malay host, make sure that you avoid wrapping the gift with the color yellow as it is the color of royalty. The other that you should avoid is white as it represents death and mourning. If you’re going to bring food make sure that it is halal meaning permissible for ‘Muslim’ to consume. Do not bring alcohol to a Muslim home as it is haram or not permissible in Islam. Always offer the gifts with the right hand or with both hands. Generally the gifts are not opened immediately and are opened after the guests have left.
Chinese culture
When bringing gifts to a Chinese host, don’t wrap gifts in white, blue or black colors. These colors that represent death and mourning. Wrap the gifts in cheerful colors and colors that are considered lucky by the Chinese like red, yellow or pink. Also give gifts in even numbers and not odd numbers as they’re also considered unlucky by the Chinese. Another important thing that we should remember is that knives, scissors or any cutting tools as a gift will indicate a desire to end the relationship according to the Chinese.
Question 2.
Having an open house has been become something common during festive seasons. Be it Hari Raya Puasa, Lunar New Year, Deepavali or Christmas, it is now a custom to have an open house. For the rich it can be a grand affair but for the not so rich it can be for close friends, neighbours and relatives. Our national leaders have promoted this idea to enhance unity between the different cultures of Malaysia. This can be a wonderful affair but if we are not sensitive to the different needs of our friends, this can lead to confusion and conflict. Here are three difficulties that can arise during an open house that is for large community and ways to tackle them.
- Food
Potential difficulty:
Different cultural group consumed different kinds of food. Many Hindus and Buddhists are vegetarian and do not consume meat or any kind of animal products. Muslims only consume only food that is considered halal and they do not consume alcohol. Indians who do eat meat will not eat beef as it is not allowed in their religion.
How do avoid this:
Create a menu that is made of all halal food and absolutely no liquor is served. This is to make sure that Muslims won’t any problem at all attending and consuming the food. Secondly you can have a vegetarian spread for vegetarians and it can be placed separately from non-vegetarian food. Thirdly avoid beef on the menu as to respect the wishes of Hindus.
2.Utensils
Potential difficulty:
There will be guests who would like to use their hands to eat. Some would like to chopsticks and some would like use forks and spoons. This will cause problems to your guest if they are used to eat in a certain way in a function.
How to avoid this:
For those who like to eat with hands, we must make sure that we have a place for them to wash their hands before and after they have eaten. There must enough serviettes for them to wipe their hands clean. For the ones who like to use chopsticks, disposable chopsticks can be given. Plastic fork and spoon can be used by those who prefer them, because if you have metal fork and spoons they might not be enough and it will be a hassle to clean them.
3.Labels
Potential difficulty:
Beef can look like mutton and non-vegetarian food can also look like vegetarian food. This will cause confusion among Hindus and Buddhist alike. If consumed Hindus and Buddhist will feel that they sinned and will cause them much grief and psychological agony.
How to avoid this:
A simple label on the food can help avoid this. A label saying beef, mutton and vegetarian will tell your guest what to avoid and what can he or she eat. This can also provide your guest with the impression that you are sensitive to their culture. They will leave the venue with respect for you and will definitely look forward for the next time.
Being a good host is essential to show that you are a hospitable person. In Malaysia, we are fortunate that we have a practice of having open houses during festive seasons to show our hospitality to others. However being insensitive or ill informed about the practices of other cultures can lead to confusion and conflict. The three potential difficulties and solutions that I have suggested can help us in successfully having an open house. At the end of the day we all want our guests to go back with a good impression of us. This will lead good harmony and peace in the community.
